A Mothers Day Guilt trip

This is something else on my mind. I know I came from a different generation. One of many screwed up values, skills, etc. A church that was very strict and harsh.  It should not be an excuse. As I go about trying to heal. Another one of the main things I battle is guilt.
I know I can't undo. There are some things, that you want to make amends for, but the harm is to big, to much.
I have learned to late, that you cannot and should not treat your small children like an adult. They must be allowed to be children. This needs to be a lesson to us all.
I attend a recovery group called Celebrate Recovery, they use a 12 step program from AA with a spiritual addition. Because I was never addicted to drugs or alcohol, some of the steps don't make a lot of sense to me. But its a great program. And this week, we discussed amends.
And yesterday we had a sermon on "words".  Great sermon. A comforting sermon, encouraging and yet a reminder, that we cannot take our words back. We shape our children, its our responsibility. Our duty to do the best we can with what we have. Stuff/things, our children don't need as much as they need us.
Now, what can I do about all this?  I have children I am estranged from, grandchildren. The therapist keeps telling me, that I have to let it go. I know I need to, but I want my kids to be healed from my screw ups.Hurt is hurt. Damage is damage.  Just like domestic violence, the scars are there. Hurts heal, but there are always the scars. Always the scars, I know I carry mine, I don't want to, thats part PTSD.
Our world is screwed up so bad. And the one thing I am most thankful for, is that I do have a spiritual being in my life, I call him God. Others have other things. This is not meant to push God off on you. But to share one part of my healing.
Today is Mothers Day. I know that I can count on my son Mike to call me first thing in the morning. Just like clockwork.
I call my mom, just like clockwork, I am so blessed to still have her in my life.
Don't let guilt overcome your life, if you can make amends, at least try.  Do what you can, and then it becomes their choice, their decision to make and you can finally let go of the guilt, and work on making other things better in your life.
May you have a blessed day and peace.
I found the following article on FB this morning. I hope it helps, opens eyes.
bjw

http://foreverymom.com/family-parenting/15-ways-break-childs-heart-lori-wildenberg/